BIG IS BEAUTIFUL!

I learned in biped sociology class today that humans find the female of the species more attractive if she is small and thin.


You guys are so weird! That way of thinking would not go down well in the bog, we like our women BIG!

Mum and Dad

Look at Pixie for example (my almost ex girlfriend) she is huge, and I mean mammoth, and every inch oozes gorgeous froggy femininity. She is by far the largest girl school and the best bull on the frogpool team. Every guy wants to date her.


No one believed it when she agreed to go out with me. And I include myself in that, I hadn't even asked her out. It was Newton who passed her a note in Watermanship class. He asked her to meet him at the hop on Saturday and signed it from me. I went mad at him and demanded an explanation to why he had humiliated me so much. He said he was sick of watching me staring at her all bogeyed in class, it spoilt his concentration and his grades were suffering, so he thought he'd  do something about it and put us all out of our misery.


I was just about to shove his tail down his own throat when  Pixie appeared and accepted, just like that! She actually seemed pleased!


When Saturday came I couldn't have been more excited or nervous. I spent all day wallowing in the mud bath to make sure my complexion was nice and damp. Then just as I was about to hop off Mum called and said she needed me to froglet sit! I tried to reason with her but she put her webbs down. It was so unfair!

 That was that, I tried to send Pixie a gnat message, but my gnat's battery was flat and he was asleep on a reed.


Pixie thought I'd stood her  up and was understandably very upset. You really don't want to get on the wrong side of the biggest bull in school, because the wrong side is usually her underside as she sits on your head and limits your ability to breath.I spent days trying to avoid her. Newton felt responsible (because he was!) and stuck close at all times, but eventually I had to go to Frogpool practise and that is firmly a newt free zone.


Let's just say that my first experience of dating was a very painful experience and one I hope not to repeat any time soon. Not that I could if I did want too, Pixie holds some very heavy sway over the rest of the females on school. Dating me would result in social suicide!

Don't mess with Pixie!