Frogpool- The Whys and Wherefores, The Hows and How Nots.

How to Play Frogpool

• Frogpool is a non gender specific sport so males and females can play. It is species specific however and so can only be played by frogs. Toads, newts and other amphibians are strictly banned although there have been some very high profile cases of species crossing in the professional game. The most notorious involve our very own head teacher Sir Chatternack, although nothing was ever proved.
• It is played with two teams of thirteen. The team is divided into ten bulls and three subs.
• The subs play an attacking role. They start at their teams end of the pool use all their cunning and agility to cross the pool and make contact with the oppositions side to score a goal. They are allowed to cross the pool either below or above surface as long as they stay within the play zone.
• Sound easy? Don't forget the ten bulls. The bulls play defensively, it is there job to prevent the other team's subs reaching their side by whatever means they can. They are BIG and so usually, but not always, played by females.

The Bulls

• It is a contact sport. You can make whatever contact you want with a opponent but contact with team members is strictly against the rules and may result in a penalty.
• A penalty is taken from the penalty pad. A sub sits on the pad a meter in front of the oppositions side. The bulls remain in the water. On the referee's croak they take a giant leap to touch the side but the bulls are they allowed to break surface to try and deflect the sub.

Penalty Pad

• During play if a sub manges to leap cleanly over a bull then that bull has to take 5 minutes on the time out pad.

How Not to Play Frogpool

• Don't let yourself be recruited to the Frogpool team if you are the smallest, slowest sub in the history of the school.
• Don't sit on the central pad trying to regain bearings in plain view of all bulls.
• Never need to breath or break the surface at any time during the game if you wish to survive.
• When circled by six opposing bulls never smile, wave and say, "So shouldn't we talk through our tactics?"
• When under a pile of 6 bulls don't try to escape, move, breath or make any movement that may result in broken bones.

Ouch!

• If attempting to leap a bull never accidentally land on their head, they don't like that.
• If taking a penalty leap be sure to aim high and on no account let any bull grab hold of your webs.
• Don't make any complaint to Sir Chatternack about the team's tactics unless you wish to have extra practise after school for a month.
• Never EVER EVER ask a bull on a date and then stand her up!